Mary Did You Know?

Merry Christmas everyone!  I haven't written on the blog in a while because for the last month or so, its been basically a back and forth between our social worker and the agency to perfect the home study.  Here I thought it was looking great according to the agency, but our social worker had trouble with some of the ways sections and sentences were worded.  She felt the grammar was thin and took it a little too personal (in my opinion) rather than looking at the reasons behind the wordings (ie ease of translation, not raising red flags or problems in either the US or Polish govt/courts, etc).  I have to admit to a certain amount of frustration because it seemed like the discrepancy was not over content, but how it was expressed.  I can understand both sides (no, really I can!) but while the haggling was going back and forth, I started to feel like this:

When I should have been feeling like this- its Christmas after all! :

So why the added frustration? Well, I have been also clicking off the days before we could get our documentation submitted to the USCIS since our goal was to have that in by the first of the year.  Now, although the home study is done and we should have it in our hot little hands this next week, you know the US govt is going to be moving at a snail's pace during the holidays.  So our overall goal of having the dossier in by the new year with hopefully a referral to follow soon afterwards is pretty much:

 

plllbbbbbbb!!

 

Anyway,  regardless of all that I have been very busy focusing on preparing for Christmas and it has been a happy distraction.  My son, Case, is 9 this year and although he has asked a few questions, he still believes and we are happy he does.  We have talked about the spirit of St Nicholas and are preparing for the transition that will eventually happen, but for now he loves all things Christmas and looking for our elf Eddie (the Elf on the Shelf) to tell Eddie things meant for Santa. 

But most importantly, Case is acutely aware of the reason for the season- the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  He has taken his job of doing our nativity advent calendar very seriously.  It entails reading a part of the Christmas story everyday and hanging the daily wood cutout on the nativity scene.  When all the pieces are in place, it displays the famous scene.  I'm probably not describing it well, but suffice to say he loves it and it gives us a fantastic way to discuss the Nativity every year. 

Which leads me to the title of this blog- "Mary Did You Know?"  By far, this is one of my favorite Christmas songs (that and "My Grown-up Christmas List).  It is the most poignant, beautiful, and emotional songs I have ever heard.  As a mother, especially a mother of a son, it truly speaks to my soul.  Here is the link:

 

Think about these verses in the song: "When you kissed your little baby, you kissed the face of God"; "This child that you delivered will soon deliver you".  Wow.  When I hear this, I feel the depth and breadth of emotion throughout my soul.

 

I admire and love Mary beyond words.  She has been my "mother" since mine went to heaven and for me, she is the role model I look to in my parenting decisions.  And sometimes- actually often- I marvel at the mystery of how she was able to do everything she did.  I love my son with my whole being and I know she did the same; yet, she knew what it meant to bring Jesus into the world and what must happen down the road.  How did she do it?  Mary, did you know?  There was all the circumstances surrounding her pregnancy, not to mention the strain it might have caused her and Joseph, and yet, she accepted it and her motherhood without question and wholeheartedly.  And at one time, she was like me- a new mother looking down at her newborn son fill of love and wonder and hope.  I wonder, although Mary knew what Jesus' life meant, did she truly grasp the magnitude of important things he would do when she held him as a newborn?   Maybe she did, and how completely wonderful it must have been for her.   She never looked at Jesus as anything other than her son, although she knew he was destined for great things.  But more importantly, she knew she was destined to be his mother, end of story.   She loved him because God brought him to her- even if it was unconventional, to say the least. 

And that's why this song speaks to me.  Not just because of the son I have and gave birth to, but also for the son we are destined to have that will be brought to us by God.   So, as we are finishing this (often frustrating) paperwork, I have to look to Mary.  There is a little boy out there that will need me as a mama and I will need guidance and support to help me be the mother God intends me to be.  Did Mary know?  We'll never know.  What we do know is she handled herself with grace, loved Jesus beyond measure, and ultimately gave the world our Savior.  And I know when my time comes, I will look to Mother Mary for guidance and support and never, ever forget the lessons she taught us- a mother's love is infinite and can make all the difference. 

Blessings to you all during this beautiful Christmas season!